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Burgess et al. / SEXUAL HOMICIDE lost in later negative perspectives and behaviors. The following example illustrates the pervasive nature of the child’s negative daydreaming: 1 felt guilty for having those thoughts (toward family] and submerged them and built up lots of hostility and then it got off into fantasy. . . . They should have noticed it at school, so excessive was my daydreaming that it was always in my report cards. . .. 1 was dreaming about wiping out the whole school. Early Sexualization of Fantasy The childhood onset of sexual fetish interests was noted in the subjects. Several subjects described strong interest and attraction at approximately the age of five to high heeled shoes, female underwear, and rope. The men were aware of the carryover of sexualized fantasies about these items into adoles- cence and adulthood. When the subjects began to murder, these items took on importance 1n ritualized aspects of their murders. Evidence of childhood sexualized play in the lives of the murderers was also revealed by parents and caretakers. Some parents provided information about preschool! sexual fantasies. In one case, a mother recalled finding hex 3-year-old son, with one end of a string tied to his penis and the other end of the string shut in a bureau drawer, leaning backward to exert a pulling sensation on his penis. The boy’s behavior suggested he had engaged in such activity earlier. Itis most likely that this behavior was inwoduced initially by an older person; evidence suggests the boy's babysitter was responsible. Aggressive Components of Early Fantasy When murderers were asked to describe their early favorite play activities, some revealed a repetitive acting out of a core aggressive fantasy. These childhood fantasies were so dominant that they became persistent themes in play with other children or alone. In some cases, an original violation or assault was expressed. For example, one subject at age 15 took younger boys into the bathroom of his residential facility and forced oral and anal sex on them, reenacting his own victimization at age 10 but reversing his role from victim to victimizer. However, he did not consciously connect this behavior with his own earlier assaults. The assaultive rituals were his attempts at mastery and control over people and situations. Another offender as an adolescent openly masturbated in his home, espe- cially in front of his sisters, using their underwear in his masturbation rituals. He appeared oblivious to the inappropriate nature of his acts, and was offended by his family’s response, feeling that family members were rejecting, intolerant, and unfair. It is speculated that his behavior represented a hyper- arousal state derived from a repressed memory from childhood. Aggressive content in the form of death themes was also noted for those murderers who described their early fantasies. Death is an example of ulti- 47